Oh my. Can’t quite remember when I’ve been this sleepy.
1am trigger shot went without a hitch, and my early morning bloodwork came back fine – ie: HCG is in my system, not cysted up in my butt-muscle somewhere. Which means tomorrow is a go. Officially and truly a go.
And almost the most exciting thing about that is that it’s the perfect excuse for lazing around all day and not doing much of anything except dozing. Because right now, that’s about as far ahead as I’m thinking.
Ok, so that was a great big lie. I am nothing but a bundle of nerves at this point. Raw nerves. Hopeful nerves.
I hope the anesthesiologist doesn’t miss my vein again, so my hand swells and turns purple and makes me worry it’s going to go, you know, gangrenous and have to be amputated.
I hope it’s my doctor doing the retrieval, and not Dr. Bigshot since I’m pretty sure Dr. BS will miss some eggs if he’s the man in charge.
I hope we don’t get into a fender bender on our way to the retrieval.
I hope my doctor doesn’t get into a fender bender on the way to the retrieval.
I hope the anesthesia doesn’t make me sick.
I hope I’m not too sore when I wake up.
I hope I don’t wake up in the middle of the procedure.
I hope the boy is able to do his part without getting too anxious.
I hope the PIO shots won’t hurt as much as I remember them hurting.
I hope all my scars from the last rounds of PIO have dissipated.
I hope Lovenox isn’t a painful injection. I hope the boy won’t go out of town at all for the next 12 weeks so I never have to give myself a PIO injection.
I hope I won’t have to deal with my insurance too often in order to get the Lovenox delivered on time.
I hope I don’t get laid off and therefore lose my insurance while I’m still in the midst of all this medical crap.
I hope I have enough pessaries that I won’t have to order more for at least a few weeks.
I hope I have to take them for more than a few weeks.
I hope the embryologist gets a good night’s sleep tonight and awakens refreshed and giddily happy about his role in making babies.
I hope he gets way more eggs to play with than what I saw yesterday.
I hope every single one of those imaginary 20 or 30 eggs is perfect and super-hardy and worth all the DHEA side effects.
I hope we have eggs to spare, eggs to freeze, eggs to donate.
I hope we get a baby out of all of this. A real, live, take-home baby that in about 9 months looks a little bit like him and will eventually laugh a little bit like me.
I hope we get a baby.